Who owns you, may seem like a silly question at first glance. When a deeper dive is taken, take note of what burdens you carry on a daily basis. Here is where you will find the answers. My own burdens had to be removed before I could ever begin to claim ownership over my own body. In fact, I did not even know I was not the owner of my own show. What holds us back from reclaiming ownership can be a multitude of compiled junk, much like the messy trash left under all the bags at the bottom of the bin. These can include items such as: past unresolved traumas, current overbearing relationships, untrue titles we hold as our own, transferred energies, negative self talk, secrets and lies, and the list keeps going on! Claiming ownership of your own body is necessary to awaken the deeper parts of your soul. Just as the mind and body are connected, so is the mind, body, spirituality, and sexuality. Once you start to awaken one, the rest should follow suit. Life has rhythms it follows to balance itself out. Your body is no different than these life rhythms it thrives for.
Unresolved traumas play a role in stealing your ownership by controlling your day to day narrative. Sometimes this even carries well past the sunset into the night skies, as you lay awake controlled by the past reel that continues to haunt the depths of your mind. In this scenario, both day and night is possibly ran by a past program that you never asked for. It is like opening that one virus containing email, but never having the option to erase it. It slowly creeps in when it chooses to steal your control with anxiety or fear. Your anticipation that it will return ends up ruining most of the joys you would otherwise indulge in. Even the anticipation of having the uncontrollable nightmares will frighten your overly tired body into a waken state desperately wanting change. Facing these unwanted programs to rewire them, with methods like E.M.D.R. will help regain your overall ownership.
Overbearing relationships also play a role in the who owns who game. You want to be liked or understood at the very least. The overbearing personality runs the show every-time you are with them. Redirecting what you like or even redirecting what you think. They instead, transfer what their likes or thoughts are onto you. This personality will even be bold enough to attempt to steal your thoughts when you are away from them. They might attempt to have you contact them for permission to just be yourself. They might leave you feeling inadequate or questioning any attempt you have at decision making. What is your favorite color? Might turn into a lost debate, due to the overbearing personality knowing you better than you know yourself. Let me clear here, no one should ever know you better than you know yourself, with the exception of God. It is best to set boundaries or cut this personality type loose.
Untrue titles are just that, titles we have been given by others that are simply not true or titles we have even labeled ourselves with. The red head that gets called, "Ugly" for no other reason than she is different. The nickname that the mean kid coined you due to a mistake you made in third grade. The otherwise loving titles family members label us thinking they are being endearing. In this group, titles we accidentally gave ourselves as we were growing into ourselves can be to blame. So maybe a sport we may have played defining us by our position or a job title we may have acquired. These were sometimes meant to be stepping stones to our greater selves, but anchor us down by the value we gave to them. Remove these titles you are holding onto much like a delete key on a computer. It is time to free up some space on your device, your brain.
Transferred energies is a tricky one, because we do not always recognize the energies that have been transferred to us. This might be as simple as taking on an angry drivers rage as he flips you the bird. It can also be an ill intentioned sneaky transfer by a passive aggressive personality wanting you to feel bad. Even what we watch on the television, can transfer what the news or actors intended on pulling from you-your emotion! Learn to not take on others energies. This takes practice setting boundaries for yourself, recognizing the energy to not accept it as your own.
Negative self talk comes mostly from the ego trying to always be the shining star in your reality. Training your brain to not give into these thoughts can be difficult. The ego needs a replacement stat, to properly flip this around! Positive affirmation or Iffirmations is a great way to concur the beast. Also practicing removing the negative thought in its tracks. Out loud voicing, "I am not going to think that thought today." If it is not contributing to the better good of your soul, it does not have a spot at your table to still be fed.
Secrets and lies can both be a burden to you, as well as the person you are asking to carry them for you. This is a vice versa mantra! The secrets hold much more weight than most of us are capable of carrying. On the other hand, lies eat away at our very essence of self down into the outer rim of our soul. I am not talking about a surprise birthday or a job advancement type of secret as we call them, "white lies.' I am talking about the secrets and lies that ultimately cause deep hurt and pain to others. Ownership of your life will never shatter that of others. Set boundaries ahead of time around gossip and what you are willing to hold onto for someone else. Gently relating how much you care, but can not hold onto unwanted burdens you might not have a solution for. If you can not fix it, this is a burden dump.
Overall ownership takes time to regain once lost. It takes a self awareness and growth that is beyond your younger years capability. We all deal with these life distractions so try not to beat yourself up over a greater awareness of yourself. Maturing comes by living through the ebbs and flows of life. Starting with one area and practicing it everyday, is a start to regaining ownership. Once you finally start to regain yours, realize ownership is a constant maintenance package you have to show up to on a regular basis. Triggers will always pop up, life events, people, old patterns we might seek at times... Remember who is in charge of you and the rest will fall into place as long as you work on yourself. Self-love never rang so true as it does in regards to "Self Ownership."
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